Single #8: Lara Flynn Moyle

Meet Lara

Gender: Ha! I don't subscribe to the gender binary... mostly because my thyroid problem makes me grow hair out of my cheeks.

Age: Oh, you didn't? Ha! Next you're going to ask my weight aren't you? Ha... my age is somewhere in the range of 11 and 37.75.

Weight: What is this a medical exam? Ha!

Body Type: Buxom

Weight: Um, hello? Ha! I told you a true lady doesn't share her age or her weight.

Best Asset: Ha! Easy-peazy, miss sleazy... My style.

Seeking: My partner in crime!

If you were to be sold at a deli for $1/pound you would cost: $167 and about five dollars more when I'm on my period. Ha! gross! Ha! you tricked me. Ha! I'll chop you.

About Lara
For Lara, there is no separation between work and play. The two harmonize better than the Bee Gees for this American Apparel senior manager. "It's great, I tell you! It's fabulous! The colours! The overpriced colours! Ha! I'm surrounded by an explosion of colours all day in a store that feels like the inside of an iPod!" Though the inside of an iPod is presumably filled with chips and wires, somehow this allusion makes sense. Cue the dancing shadows.

It's no surprise to the naked eye that someone like Lara is in the fashion industry. Her love of all things ecclectic and obscure combined with herunfortunate self-confidence lends itself to a unique style. "I am never boring with my style. Never. Ha! N-E-V-E-R! Life's too short to be boring. Dive into the deep end, eh? Jump the cliff. Push the boundaries. Challenge the status quo. Dare to be yourself. Good women rarely make history (ha! or something like that ha!)! Carpe Diem. Act now! Before-" I left our interview to have a cigarette as Lara continued to dictate her catalogue of aphorisms through the store window. When I came back, it seemed she had gotten carried away: "And the LORD said unto Joshua, Ha! Fear not, neither be thou dismayed: take all the people of war with thee, and arise, go up to Ai: see, I have given into thy hand the king of Ai, and his people, and his city, and his land. Ha!"

Needless to say, Lara likes to talk. A lot. "Some of my friends call me a chatterbox! Ha! But I've lost them over time." This shouldn't disuade gentlemen callers from pursuing Lara. She's intelligent, vibrant and... vibrant. She's proud of what she does and tells me it truly reflects her values as both a fashionista and a humanitarian: "I work for a company that pays their factory workers an adequate wage but stops short of being preachy by objectifying half-dressed 14-year-old girls in their ads! Ha! You don't want to seem too wholesome these days! Fashion needs an edge!" I rebuttled that fashion needs properly sewn clothing with seams that won't unravel with a warm summer breeze. "Ha!"